Hello everyone! Today I am going to take you all on a journey. And not just any journey, a journey to make you beautiful. Hold up! This isn’t click bait. I swear, I got this straight from the beautiful people themselves!
Part 1: I smell like a cake
So, I woke up this morning feeling quite happy about the weather for once. Summers in Bengal usually bring along oven like temperatures suitable for baking the best human patties. However, today the sky was a beautiful cloudy grey. A half-hearted warm breeze tickled the translucent curtains of my room and – oh praise the heavens – there wasn’t any sun! In my books that’s what a good day is made of! I went to the bathroom and was happily chilling on the pot, listening to Sea Wolf and thinking about the day when I suddenly remembered… The banana! Oh god! The awful banana! One which I had forgotten about, shoved to the back of the fridge where it wouldn’t have been noticed and hoped to have thrown away without anyone finding out. The poor banana had blackened with age and was definitely not going to be eaten (by me). And as I pondered on throwing it away before anyone notice, the garbage man came and without thinking, I gave away the day’s garbage once again forgetting the banana… You must understand, the banana was only a small thing resting in the back of my mind as I went about all these activities. But now, it became a bigger thing. And by thing, I mean problem. A problem I knew that if I didn’t solve today, would nag at me till I did.
While living with my roommate Cat, in college and watching her blossom into one of these beautiful people I learnt a few tricks of the trade. She and I would occasionally mix strange food items and paste them to our heads in order to make our hair or skin better. She being the beautiful person did this more than I did, but often it would be a joint activity where we would sit and do each other’s hair and talk about fighting the patriarchy. It was like having a sister, but better. And when the room ended up smelling strongly of egg after us having spread copious amounts of it all over our hair our bonds were strengthened.
Anyway, back to today now. So, with a generous flashback in my mind, nostalgia running through my veins and a blackened banana sitting in my fridge, I did a quick google search. “Banana hair mask”. Now, if you don’t know what a hair mask is I don’t know what to tell you, It’s like a face mask, but for your hair. So basically, it should ideally make your hair look and feel better and nourish it the way conditioner says it will but never does. Ingredients of a mask like this are mostly food items. So here is what I used in my mask today: A quick pop into my fridge and out came the banana and one egg. Then while getting a bowl from the kitchen, into the bowl went two large spoons of olive oil. Out to the table and I poured in some honey and finally emptied a capsule of vitamin E oil which Cat would always use in her hair. I also added some of Loreal’s oil and cream later but that was just to be fancy. (Note that these measurements are were not done meticulously and have been poured to the amount I thought was necessary).
Now a lot of the mask recipes called for only 2 (maximum 3) ingredients. If you had the olive oil and the banana that would also have worked. But of course, I had to be extra and put in extra things. Once my ingredients were all in I had to mash everything together and make it a paste of some sort for even application on my head.
Here’s where the banana was a problem. I’d suggest, for scatterbrains like me to take a fork and a flat plate or something to mash your banana on first and THEN and only THEN put it in with the egg and/ or oil and whatever you’re using. (if you do use it).
Now with everything mixed and mashed up I let down my hair and prayed to god this wouldn’t get messy. SPOILER ALERT!! It did. I used my fingers to scoop the mixture up and massage it gently into my hair by starting from the root to the tip. Nah I’m kidding. I slapped it on and let it trickle down to my scalp and rubbed it in well. I made sure to get quite a bit on my ends since that’s where most of my “bad” hair is and twisted it up into a bun. Then I poured the rest of the mixture down on my head, allowing it to percolate down. Worst decision ever. Thank goodness I was wearing a nightdress so the dripping has been of not much consequence. And so I’ve been sitting with it for about half an hour now in my hair and writing this while I wait for it to dry. It has not. It has instead done quite the opposite. As usual I took too much in quantities and it has led to it dripping down my back, down my neck all over my front. The mixture is sticky and unpleasant however, it does smell of cake so that’s the only upside. I’m going to watch an episode of Tokyo Ghoul and then go for a shower and come back with my results!
Part 2: I slipped so many times…
Banana mask my ass… Banana cement more like it. I am exquisitely exhausted after that ordeal. And why do I say ordeal you ask. Well, to put it simply, the banana refused to leave my hair. The tangles were spurred on by the banana and I had to wrestle with it for 15 minutes before I got my combs to rescue me. The combs did help speed things up a little bit. With every few brushes I had to clean off the banana bits, and my falling hair, from the teeth of the comb. There were tiny dots of banana all over the floor which wouldn’t get washed away till I emptied a bucket of water on them.
Eventually after washing out my hair twice (otherwise the smell of egg doesn’t go), and the muscles of my arms screaming for mercy, I topped off with conditioner and washed it, giving one final run through with my comb so as to pick up any missed banana bits. And now here I am waiting for it to dry and promising to never put myself through that again.
Overall, I honestly don’t see a difference. Yes, I know that these don’t work immediately, and you have to keep using it to see a difference and all that jazz. However, the end reward is slightly thwarted when you take into account the tangles that the banana caused and the amount of hair that fell along with it in the process. This mask was supposed to make my hair less frizzy and smoother, but I had to instead put a whole lot more conditioner to help counter the knots that had been created my hair doesn’t feel much more different than what it had been and it definitely has lost quite a bit of volume with all the hair that fell. So, I would not recommend putting banana in your hair, unless there’s a less tangly way of doing it. I got through this whole thing only because MCR was playing loudly in the background allowing me to focus on the lyrics rather than the pain in my arms. My hair after drying feels lighter and fluffy, it does feel smooth to an extent but it’s nothing that conditioner wouldn’t do. I used a lot of water in order to get the banana out. All in all, I have learnt that I should really eat my bananas before they go black.
TL;DR: I used banana in my hair and it wasted a ton of water and tangled my hair.